Wednesday, December 18, 2013

The Night Before Obamacare


-Twas the night before Obamacare, and all through the land
The enrollment deadline was frighteningly at hand.
The pink slips were hung by the chimney with care,
And hopes for employment simply weren’t there.
-The children were huddled, asleep in their beds
While visions of high premiums took hold of our heads.
And Ma in her “kerchief, and I in my cap,
With nary a clue and a policy gap.
-When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Oh my GOD, please tell me that THAT’S not a rash.
-The policy I liked had been taken away
And the DOCTOR I liked had told me NO WAY.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Canadian bus and 2 REALLY large ears.
-It was a little old campaigner, so my door I did lock,
I knew in a moment it no doubt was Barack.
More rapid than vultures the coursers they came
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
“Now Harry! Now Nancy and Jarret, you vixen!”
“ON Sebelius! On Carney! This law I’ll be fixen’”
Get AWAY from my house, stay OUTSIDE the wall!!
BE GONE ,BE GONE, BE GONE WITH YOU ALL!!!
-As dry leaves that before his bloviations did fly,
When they meet with the TRUTH just as plain as the sky.
So UP in the yard the coursers they flew,
With a crock full of crap and a teleprompter too.
-And then, in a twinkling, I heard in the night,
That Ted Cruz was the one who was actually RIGHT!
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
THROUGH MY WINDOW, UNINVITED, CAME BARACK WITH A BOUND!
-He was a bald-faced liar, from his head to his foot,
And his website was still down, not working, kaput.
A bundle of promises he had flung on his back,
He was nothing but a con man, a shyster, a hack.
His eyes didn’t twinkle, what he had, was a leer,
As he made a noise in his throat and said, ”Let me be perfectly clear.”
“You’ll LIKE socialism, You’ll see, Just go with the flow,”
And “I’m a Marxist, TRUST me You’ll LOVE it, I KNOW!”
He gave me a smile as he lied through his teeth,
And the smoke he was blowing encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a thin face and not much of a belly,
But his WIFE’S double wide keester, THAT shook just like jelly.
-She was chubby and plump, and looked like a Wookie
And I laughed when she told me to put down the cookie.
A wink of his eye and a twist of her head,
Soon led me to know I had PLENTY to dread.
-Barack finally stopped talking, but went straight to his work,
Redistributing wealth, good grief, what a jerk.
And flipping the finger while thumbing his nose,
And leaving us nothing, up the chimney he rose!
He jumped on his bus, to his team gave a shout,
And away they all sped, the minions…The lout.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
“I’VE TAKEN YOUR INSURANCE AND CANCELLED YOUR RIGHTS!!!!”


H/T dereid49